Did you know that one of the major reasons why we become addicted to anything, food, alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling, smoking, etc. is because that substance or behavior helps us to connect to God, or the feeling of God?It is undeniably true. We search for an addiction that will give us that "hit", that "feeling" of being one with something greater than ourselves. And every addiction known to man does exactly just that.The first or second drink for the alcoholic is literally an experience of heaven, just like the first or second drag off of a cigarette, or the first big bite of a piece of cake, or the first or second line of cocaine to the drug addict.
In each of these cases, there is a direct feeling of "ahhhhhhhhhh, now we'll be OK."As a gratefully recovering alcoholic and drug addict, I know firsthand that feeling of connecting with God through my substances of choice. I felt free, relaxed, at ease, and even confident with my wine in hand, or the lines of coke on the table. Even the thought of doing a line, would make me feel excited, ready to feel the oneness with divinity, where all is good. Pouring that glass of wine, and the feeling that came while finishing the first, and looking forward to the second, was heaven.
If I was on the beach, listening to the water, feeling the sun on my skin as it was setting, holding my wine like a sacred nectar, would signal the end of a day, time to fully let go and surrender to the "perfect " life. We all know that the perfect life is divine, divinity itself.But there is a catch. For all addicts, that "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh " feeling was short lived. After that first piece of cake, or cigarette, the chase to find the "ahhhh", the futile chase would begin. And, it would never be found. "Chasing the dragon", a phrase used by many drug addicts, signaled the truth....we were chasing our own demise. You see, that feeling is short lived, and is a false sense of a connection that we are searching for. The second or third drink cannot bring back the original moment that we felt finally relaxed, so we would have another, and another, but to no avail.We now were addicted to chasing, but never catching, that divine feeling again.
And the race was on. A false and frustrating sense of security was being chased, as we tried to fill a void with a substance or behavior that will never ever fill it.The void we are trying to fill is the void of love, or God, or our higher power. The reason why all successful recovery programs, including the one I personally run, include a spiritual component of some kind, is because the only option for anyone struggling with any addiction is to surrender to a higher power, who some call God.While we all do find this feeling of a higher power initially through our addictions believe it or not, it will never stay.
However, when we find what we are looking for through a recovery program, that feeling can stay longer and longer. And, we won't be killing ourselves, and destroying relationships in the process.Yes, while all addictions lead us to the feeling of invincibility, divinity, or God right here on earth, thank goodness there is another way to find that same connection.If you or someone you know is struggling with any form of addiction, please contact me as soon as possible, or any other recovery program. There is so much help available, don't wait another day to find it.Slow down.
Love, peace,Rev. David http://www.davidessel.com/
Friday, August 21, 2009
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Abundance Workshop Series
Join us for this 3 part series to learn how to bring in more abundance into your life.
SEPT 19, Saturday - Abundance 101 sets the stage for the proceeding classes 102 and 103 by teaching the fundamentals of the Law of Attraction, Gestation and Gender. The difference between gratitude and appreciation and how to use these for manifesting. Giving and receiving and what is waiting for you in your treasure house and much more.... 1-4pm
OCT 3rd, Saturday - Abundance 102 follows on the heels of 101 by exploring your treasure house further using the zodiacal wheel. Then we play, we create and we imagine. 1-4pm
OCT 17th, Saturday - Abundance 103 takes it to another level by examining the four building blocks of creation and creating sacred space to assist you in your focus as a creator of abundance. This time we will be making a magickal tool which can be used for blessing your projects and dreams.
1-4pm
Cost: $120 for the entire series (All 3 Classes). Each class is a pre-requisite for the next. (includes materials)
To RSVP call: Renee at 239-560-6314.
Location: Church of Spiritual Light, 1939 Park Meadows Dr. #1, Ft. Myers, FL 33907
The Intenders Road Show: Living by Manifesting
Tuesday, September 29th, 6:30-9:30pmPresented by Church of Spiritual Light
Ft. Myers, FL
The Intenders of the Highest Good Co-Founder and author Tony Burroughs will be presenting The Intenders Road Show’s latest workshop entitled Living by Manifesting at Church of Spiritual Light on September 29, 2009 in Ft. Myers, Florida.
The Intenders of the Highest Good is one of the world’s fastest growing motivational communities. Founded by four friends, including Tony, in Hawaii fifteen years ago, the Intenders combines the Law of Attraction with the power of community peer groups, and has helped thousands of people around the world realize and manifest their dreams.
Joining Tony for this event will be Tina Stober, another original founder of The Intenders, and Tina will introduce her friend, Lee Ching, who has guided the Intenders since their inception. Tony and Tina will also be accompanied by singer/songwriter, Aaron Jacobson. Aaron will open each session by singing songs from his album, Wrestling with Angels. Following the music, Tony and Tina will share intention success stories about how they have integrated the Intention Process into their lives and how it is empowering Intenders all across the globe.
The Intenders Road Show was started last year in Ashland, Oregon when Tony, Tina, and Aaron came together with several other Intenders from around the country to create their new movie, “On the Road with The Code.” This 2 DVD set is based on a present day code of conduct made up of ten Intentions that are helping people become more proficient at manifesting. Tony has written six books and produced two videos about the Law of Attraction. His most recent book, entitled “The Code: 10 Intentions for a Better World,” is published by Weiser Books and is available at bookstores everywhere. .
To register for the Living by Manifesting Workshop, please call Joanna Salerno at 239-850-3217. The cost of this event is $35 per person and everyone is welcome.
More information about Tony Burroughs and The Intenders of the Highest Good can be found by visiting www.intenders.com.
Church of Spiritual Light, 1939 Park Meadows Dr., #1, Ft. Myers, Fl 33907 (Map)
Click here to download your free Intenders poster.
Think & Grow Rich Mastermind Group
NEW GROUP BEGINS OCT 15th
12 PM – 1:30 PM and continuing for 13 consecutive Thursdays - Free of Charge
NEW MASTERMIND GROUP FORMING!
How does a Mastermind Group work and why would you want to join?
A Mastermind Group is a group of high level thinking business owners and individuals. We meet once a week for 13 weeks to transform our lives through the power of the principles taught in” Think and Grow Rich” and the energy of the other group members. You’ll have the opportunity to exchange ideas, and develop profitable relationships with the other members of the group.
YOU CAN EASILY MAGNETIZE YOUR MIND BY CHANGING YOUR THINKING WITH SUPPORT FROM OTHERS.
Did you know that a magnetized piece of iron can pick up 24 times its own weight? If you de-magnetized, that same piece of iron it cannot even pick up a feather!
YOUR MIND WORKS THE SAME WAY! Magnetized, you experience power, confidence, strength, health and attract wealth. Demagnetized your mind is full of fear, envy, doubt, and you experience poverty.
CHANGE YOUR THINKING TO WHAT?
If you could change your thinking by learning from five hundred of the most successful people that have ever lived, including four U.S. Presidents, would you want to do it? What would it be worth to you?
The knowledge of how to magnetize your mind is hidden in the pages of “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill along with the secret knowledge of the wealthiest people in America. “Think and Grow Rich has been on Business Week’s Best-Seller’s List since 1937!
FACILITATOR
Your facilitator, Jasse Matasse shares her incredible story of overcoming fear, illness, death, financial ruin and loss, to triumph and learning how to be happy, healthy and financially free by applying the principals of “Think and Grow Rich” Speaker, Success Coach, and Hypnotherapist, Jasse Matasse, shows you HOW to go from GOOD to GREAT. As Jasse says, “If my associate, Bob Proctor of “The Secret” can go from $4,000.00 to $1,000,000.00 in one year with no education or business experience what is stopping us?" To find out more about Jasse visit: www.bonitahypnosis.com | www.LifeSuccessGlobal.comDATES: Starts Thursday, Oct 15th at 12 PM – 1:30 PM and continuing for 13 consecutive Thursdays. (It is important to make a commitment to the entire 13 weeks, in order to create synergy with the group. Therefore the group is closed to registration after the 3rd week).
LOCATION: Church of Spiritual Light, 1939 Park Meadows Drive, Unit 1, Fort Myers, Fl 33907 Map
Fee: No charge. All you need is to have the same book everyone else is using. Think and Grow Rich: Original version revised and restored by Ross Cromwell. The cover is navy, maroon and white. One time book cost is $20.00.
Do you have questions? Call Jasse. Take the first step. You are worth it. Simply e-mail Jasse at jasse.success@gmail.com. or call 772-332-3889
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Bringing in the Bodhisattva
A Bodhisattva is a being who has endured the path of suffering, has processed their karma and is in full realization of their darma. That is to say, now they are free to do their life's work which entails "going back" and helping others to attain that same freedom. They have transcended the need for death and rebirth because they have come to know themselves and consequently others so well, that there is nothing left to "die" to. In other words, they have come full circle within themselves. The illusion of physical reality has been put in it's place and the power of the Higher Self has been fully integrated into the body. For the Bodhisattva, what is occurring on the physical level is very real, but it is not the end of the story. The Bodhisattva knows that everything is energy, the power of the mind and the purpose of suffering.
Therefore the Bodhisattva's master purpose is to relieve the "needless" suffering of the world. This is done by becoming the embodiment or the "antidote" to a certain type of suffering, which arises as a result of the sufferer being locked into the mindset that physical reality is all there is. The Bodhisattva is well aware of and can work with non-local reality to hold the space for the suffering to move forward. The further along the Bodhisattva gets in grounding their energies into the physical, the more people they can assist to heal.
Opening to the experience of Bodhisattva is a very personal and powerful one on the path to healing, empowerment and enlightenment. You may think it is just for some. But let me assure you that this archetype is dead center on the path to freedom. So I'd like to show some practical ways to encourage and activate the energies of the Bodhisattva into your life.
My healing modality utilizes the power of archetypal energies, Light, color and visualization. One exercise to bring in the power of the Bodhisattva and to further develop and integrate those characteristics into our life is balancing, integrating, and interweaving the energies located at the Sacral Chakra. The sacral chakra holds in it's structure the gateway for us to express our creativity, passion and sexuality by activating our life force in readiness for manifestation. This is more or less where the Kundalini energy coalesces before it takes physical form, as is outpictured by the womb of a woman being the container for the growing human embryo.
There are two master archetypes that are working with us to teach us lessons and in layman's terms "running programs" within our psyche and energy body in the sacral chakra. They are the Martyr and the Emperor/Empress (or another name might be the Hedonist). These two powerful forces are neither good, nor bad in their own right. They just are. And yet, certainly one or the other can take dominance and help us spin our life out of control. The key lies in integrating these energies together. It might seem like an impossible task, considering how they seem to be polar opposites. It is important to understand that what will be created out of the merging of these energies within us, is yet a third thing: The Bodhisattva.
Imagine a venn diagram and you can see how this occurs. (A venn diagram is two circles which are drawn partially overlapping that creates a vertical eye shape where the two circles overlap.) This is exactly how these energies work together. Where we want to stay is in the space of that eye, where the two meet. This is where the Bodhisattva energies become active in our life. Sometimes we are moving into that space without consciousness. The purpose of this teaching is to help you move and stay in that space more often, ultimately operating your entire life from that middle path with full consciousness, focus and will.
The Bodhisattva has been there and done that....you can't play a player. It is very difficult to pull the wool over the eyes of someone who has admitted to the worst in their own self and has faced and continues to face their own fears and darkness. The Bodhisattva holds a great deal of light for this very reason; they are always shining the light of truth upon themselves. This release of their own suffering is what has made room in their aura and in their soul to hold these powerful energies. And it is in this way that they work with the archetype of martyr or the wounded healer. Yet, the wounded healer can be very dysfunctional all on their own. The wounded healer can help a great many people heal, but it is often at a great price and that is that this occurs sometimes through coyote medicine and they themselves are keeping their own woundedness in the dark by covering it with helping others.
The opposing force to the martyr is the emperor/empress or hedonist. The hedonist loves life, enjoys pleasure and makes sure that they are well taken care of, especially on the physical level. As you can imagine, the hedonist is a prime candidate for acting out addictions and aggression, while the martyr is the one who represses and "acts in", meaning most of their transgressions are committed against themselves.
Hopefully you can see how these two archetype could benefit by joining forces. The bottom line is that the martyr, who is willing to die for their cause needs to be balanced by the hedonist, who is willing to live for their cause. It is difficult to give what you do not have or know that you have. Therefore it is imperative in the development of the Bodhisattva that they begin to receive in order to share. This is where the power of the hedonist, put in check by the martyr can allow this new creature to emerge within: The Bodhisattva.
This is the middle way, the middle path and is a vital component to becoming a healthy altruist. These archetypes are very, very powerful. Working with an archetype is like downloading a program that bypasses sensory input. This is working energetically and on a soul level. Even if you don't understand, your soul or your psyche will.
A powerful method to integrate these energies is to do chakra balancing and healing work, concentrating especially at the sacral, root and solar plexis. Envision the color red at your feet up to your groin, now see the color yellow at your navel, allow these two color to merge at the womb area (below the navel) and see the color orange emerge. On your left side envision the martyr - even call to mind someone in real life or from history that you associate with this, and on your right side envision an emperor or empress. See each character in all their regalia. Allow these energies to permeate your mind. Now see them coming together in your womb area, and inside that color orange see them coming together and becoming one being. This is your Bodhisattva. Take this being and allow it to become as large as your physical body. See yourself heart to heart, face to face. Step into this being and allow yourself to feel the immense, wisdom, devotion, compassion and divine love as you mingle your energies.
You have now drawn the divine matrix for the Bodhisattva to emerge in your life. This will open the gates of glory in your life. The irony is that the word glory will take on a whole new meaning. The glory will be for the great work. The glory will be that you understand that you belong to the world and the world belongs to you. There is no separation and so there is no sacrifice. The giving and the receiving are inextricably combined. Abundance will flow and you will create or become a part of a powerful legacy. When the Bodhisattva, this royalty shows up in your life, you will be at a place where your loss of innocence, all you have been through will be coming full circle and your life force will be activated in a way that you can't possibly now imagine. The beauty of it all will be revealed and you will see the undeviating justice at work in the world as you fully claim your personal power for the highest good of us all.
May you walk in beauty. May you walk in peace. May you be overflowing with love and compassion as you create, integrate and embody your art, your work, your masterpiece in this world.
They key is to feel like an empress and think like a martyr and you will be guided onto the middle path every time. This is the becoming of the Bodhisattva.
by: Rev. Renee Bledsoe
AddictionAlchemy.com
Therefore the Bodhisattva's master purpose is to relieve the "needless" suffering of the world. This is done by becoming the embodiment or the "antidote" to a certain type of suffering, which arises as a result of the sufferer being locked into the mindset that physical reality is all there is. The Bodhisattva is well aware of and can work with non-local reality to hold the space for the suffering to move forward. The further along the Bodhisattva gets in grounding their energies into the physical, the more people they can assist to heal.
Opening to the experience of Bodhisattva is a very personal and powerful one on the path to healing, empowerment and enlightenment. You may think it is just for some. But let me assure you that this archetype is dead center on the path to freedom. So I'd like to show some practical ways to encourage and activate the energies of the Bodhisattva into your life.
My healing modality utilizes the power of archetypal energies, Light, color and visualization. One exercise to bring in the power of the Bodhisattva and to further develop and integrate those characteristics into our life is balancing, integrating, and interweaving the energies located at the Sacral Chakra. The sacral chakra holds in it's structure the gateway for us to express our creativity, passion and sexuality by activating our life force in readiness for manifestation. This is more or less where the Kundalini energy coalesces before it takes physical form, as is outpictured by the womb of a woman being the container for the growing human embryo.
There are two master archetypes that are working with us to teach us lessons and in layman's terms "running programs" within our psyche and energy body in the sacral chakra. They are the Martyr and the Emperor/Empress (or another name might be the Hedonist). These two powerful forces are neither good, nor bad in their own right. They just are. And yet, certainly one or the other can take dominance and help us spin our life out of control. The key lies in integrating these energies together. It might seem like an impossible task, considering how they seem to be polar opposites. It is important to understand that what will be created out of the merging of these energies within us, is yet a third thing: The Bodhisattva.
Imagine a venn diagram and you can see how this occurs. (A venn diagram is two circles which are drawn partially overlapping that creates a vertical eye shape where the two circles overlap.) This is exactly how these energies work together. Where we want to stay is in the space of that eye, where the two meet. This is where the Bodhisattva energies become active in our life. Sometimes we are moving into that space without consciousness. The purpose of this teaching is to help you move and stay in that space more often, ultimately operating your entire life from that middle path with full consciousness, focus and will.
The Bodhisattva has been there and done that....you can't play a player. It is very difficult to pull the wool over the eyes of someone who has admitted to the worst in their own self and has faced and continues to face their own fears and darkness. The Bodhisattva holds a great deal of light for this very reason; they are always shining the light of truth upon themselves. This release of their own suffering is what has made room in their aura and in their soul to hold these powerful energies. And it is in this way that they work with the archetype of martyr or the wounded healer. Yet, the wounded healer can be very dysfunctional all on their own. The wounded healer can help a great many people heal, but it is often at a great price and that is that this occurs sometimes through coyote medicine and they themselves are keeping their own woundedness in the dark by covering it with helping others.
The opposing force to the martyr is the emperor/empress or hedonist. The hedonist loves life, enjoys pleasure and makes sure that they are well taken care of, especially on the physical level. As you can imagine, the hedonist is a prime candidate for acting out addictions and aggression, while the martyr is the one who represses and "acts in", meaning most of their transgressions are committed against themselves.
Hopefully you can see how these two archetype could benefit by joining forces. The bottom line is that the martyr, who is willing to die for their cause needs to be balanced by the hedonist, who is willing to live for their cause. It is difficult to give what you do not have or know that you have. Therefore it is imperative in the development of the Bodhisattva that they begin to receive in order to share. This is where the power of the hedonist, put in check by the martyr can allow this new creature to emerge within: The Bodhisattva.
This is the middle way, the middle path and is a vital component to becoming a healthy altruist. These archetypes are very, very powerful. Working with an archetype is like downloading a program that bypasses sensory input. This is working energetically and on a soul level. Even if you don't understand, your soul or your psyche will.
A powerful method to integrate these energies is to do chakra balancing and healing work, concentrating especially at the sacral, root and solar plexis. Envision the color red at your feet up to your groin, now see the color yellow at your navel, allow these two color to merge at the womb area (below the navel) and see the color orange emerge. On your left side envision the martyr - even call to mind someone in real life or from history that you associate with this, and on your right side envision an emperor or empress. See each character in all their regalia. Allow these energies to permeate your mind. Now see them coming together in your womb area, and inside that color orange see them coming together and becoming one being. This is your Bodhisattva. Take this being and allow it to become as large as your physical body. See yourself heart to heart, face to face. Step into this being and allow yourself to feel the immense, wisdom, devotion, compassion and divine love as you mingle your energies.
You have now drawn the divine matrix for the Bodhisattva to emerge in your life. This will open the gates of glory in your life. The irony is that the word glory will take on a whole new meaning. The glory will be for the great work. The glory will be that you understand that you belong to the world and the world belongs to you. There is no separation and so there is no sacrifice. The giving and the receiving are inextricably combined. Abundance will flow and you will create or become a part of a powerful legacy. When the Bodhisattva, this royalty shows up in your life, you will be at a place where your loss of innocence, all you have been through will be coming full circle and your life force will be activated in a way that you can't possibly now imagine. The beauty of it all will be revealed and you will see the undeviating justice at work in the world as you fully claim your personal power for the highest good of us all.
May you walk in beauty. May you walk in peace. May you be overflowing with love and compassion as you create, integrate and embody your art, your work, your masterpiece in this world.
They key is to feel like an empress and think like a martyr and you will be guided onto the middle path every time. This is the becoming of the Bodhisattva.
by: Rev. Renee Bledsoe
AddictionAlchemy.com
Practices for Non-Violence
Sunday Healing & Enlightenment Circle July 26, 2009
Below are some practices to create and integrate the compassion of the Bodhisattva into your being.
Awe
Gratitude
Receptivity
Compassion
Centering
Below are some practices to create and integrate the compassion of the Bodhisattva into your being.
Awe
Often we are so absorbed in our everyday life that we assume that this is all there is. We come to believe that the structure and horizon of the world we experience—at home, in the work-place, and through the media—is “reality.” By making this assumption, we often miss the fact that this social reality is constructed—it is a system of rules, beliefs and motivations that shape and limit our view of life. We tend, therefore, to overlook the fact that life is much more mysterious and unfathomable than the systems we manufacture to navigate through the world. When we cultivate a sense of awe for the great and irreducible mystery of our lives, we are able to see that life is more than the systems in which we live. We are also able to see that those systems can and must be transformed when they contradict or offend the great mystery that is our beginning and end.
One way of exploring this sense of mystery is to reflect on our encounters with other persons. On the one hand, these exchanges can be like following an agreed-upon formula. In that case, we are often like two billiard balls knocking against each other. On the other hand, our encounters with others can be experiences of deep communion. They can be holy moments where presence receives presence, experiences where, as phenomenologist Emmanuel Levinas says in Totality and Infinity, there is a “flow of infinity between one another’s eyes.” When two subjects encounter one another in this way—giving but not being destroyed, belonging but not “belonging to”—they experience in a momentary but tangible way the “ground of all being,” the inexhaustible mystery which creates, preserves and embraces us.
One way of cultivating this sense of awe and mystery is to take some time in a quiet place and call to mind a very important encounter you had with another person. After imagining this event in detail, consider how it happened and what some of its consequences were. Notice your feelings as you remember this event. Reflect on the ways that this exchange had an unpredictable quality, a sense of possibility, transcending prescribed social ritual or conventional scripts. Sense the mystery of the situation. Reflect on how this mystery comes in part from the way that the depth dimension of both people was shared. This depth dimension or inner mystery is that aspect of us that cannot be reducible to our assumptions, expectations or systems. Throughout the day, cultivate an awareness of this mystery.
Gratitude
A nonviolent stance is one of deep gratefulness for our life and for all life. It is a posture which acknowledges the source of this life. It recognizes that each one of us is on a spiritual journey and that all of our experiences—happy or sad—teach and transform us. It salutes all the ways we have been gifted. way of cultivating gratitude is taking some time in a quiet place and recalling ten people who have given of themselves so that your life could be better. Call to mind their faces. Remember in some detail what they have done for you. Recall the ways people have lavished their time, energy and resources on you. Cultivate this awareness throughout the day, increasingly acknowledging how our entire life—and everything that passes through it—is a gift.
Receptivity
How do we cultivate our openness to those around us? One way is to practice letting go of the ego’s armor in order to receive and heal the world. Here is an exercise which you can practice in the morning before leaving for work, or at any other time of the day.
Stand up, dropping your arms to your sides. Allow your entire body to relax. Breathe in the power of life; breathe it out into the world. Then slowly raise your arms and cross them in front of your eyes. Feel yourself protected and guarded. Slowly extend your arms outward in an attitude of openness to the world. After a few moments, move them in a gesture embracing the world. Repeat several times. This ritual can be performed alone or with others.
Compassion
Creative nonviolence opens us to the two fundamental dimensions of all beings: sacredness and woundedness. It teaches us to share the suffering of others, as well as their fulfillment. Active nonviolence seeks to put this form of accompaniment into practice as each opportunity arises.
One way of cultivating compassion is to imagine someone with whom you have an unresolved conflict or unresolved negative feelings. Imagine them sitting in front of you. Look into her or his eyes. Share your feelings about this conflict with this person. Then ask her or him to speak. You may want to write down the “dialogue” that unfolds between you. Finish this encounter by praying for one another.
Centering
There is a spiritual tradition that says that the truth of our being lies in the center of our spiritual hearts, located a little to the right of the middle of the chest. And in order to contact this center, a cave is imagined within which a blue flame burns. As an opening ritual, let us imagine this cave within that physical position and a blue flame burning steadily and brightly inside it. Now hold on to this blue flame without allowing your mind to wander…hold on…. (Giving a few minutes to stabilize the image, the facilitator says the following prayer, asking the participants to repeat each line after it is first read):
May I dwell in the heart,
May I be healed,
May I be full of love,
May I be free from suffering,
May I be joyful and free,
May I be at peace
And discover the utter radiance
Of my own true nature.
The Peace Table
The Peace Table is a tool that is used in forward thinking educational settings, such as Montessori schools very effectively. My daughter attended Montessori school for the first few years of her early education and this is how I had my first brush with the Peace Table. What an amazingly simple concept. There was also something called, The Peace Corner, where children could give themselves a time out. Again, what a concept! In the peace corner there were all kinds of things to help them to get calm and relaxed, such as soft floor pillows, soft music, an aquarium, a bowl of pretty stones, magazines and books and journals.
Children need to learn conflict resolution if they are going to make it as adults. They need to be removed from the situation, find neutral territory, and try to talk it out. The Peace Table is the perfect place to do this.
In the classroom the Peace Table is a set of small child-sized table and two chairs that is set in a quiet part of the classroom. In the middle of the table should be a Peace Flower.
When one child is upset with another, he should invite the other child to the Peace Table. The child who does the inviting begins the conversation, holding the Peace Flower. He tells the other child how she hurt his feelings and why she was invited to the Peace Table. Then he must pass it to her so that she can respond. The children keep passing the flower back and forth, speaking respectfully to each other, until their conflict is resolved. Only the child holding the Peace Flower may speak. They must keep going back and forth until the conflict is resolved. When the situation is resolved, they can hold the flower together and say, “We declare peace.”
Some children may require mediation by another student or a teacher. Especially in the beginning, adults should demonstrate proper use of the Peace Table. They can also model appropriate words and problem solving skills. Adults may need to interpret each child’s feelings for the other one as they are learning to interpret the feelings of others.
This is a technique that should not be restricted only to children. As adults we could take a huge lesson from this and try to incorporate more understanding and less violence, even if it is "just" verbal violence or passive aggression, into our lives. I'm not saying it's not Ok to be angry. That can be an honest emotion. It's how we express ourselves that will turn that anger or disappointment into the light or allow it to stay in the dark. We don't have to become dispassionate beings, but what this will lead us to is channeling our passions into our creativity and even greater cohesion of community and relationships. After all, aren't those the things to truly be passionate about, instead of our anger?
Children need to learn conflict resolution if they are going to make it as adults. They need to be removed from the situation, find neutral territory, and try to talk it out. The Peace Table is the perfect place to do this.
In the classroom the Peace Table is a set of small child-sized table and two chairs that is set in a quiet part of the classroom. In the middle of the table should be a Peace Flower.
When one child is upset with another, he should invite the other child to the Peace Table. The child who does the inviting begins the conversation, holding the Peace Flower. He tells the other child how she hurt his feelings and why she was invited to the Peace Table. Then he must pass it to her so that she can respond. The children keep passing the flower back and forth, speaking respectfully to each other, until their conflict is resolved. Only the child holding the Peace Flower may speak. They must keep going back and forth until the conflict is resolved. When the situation is resolved, they can hold the flower together and say, “We declare peace.”
Some children may require mediation by another student or a teacher. Especially in the beginning, adults should demonstrate proper use of the Peace Table. They can also model appropriate words and problem solving skills. Adults may need to interpret each child’s feelings for the other one as they are learning to interpret the feelings of others.
This is a technique that should not be restricted only to children. As adults we could take a huge lesson from this and try to incorporate more understanding and less violence, even if it is "just" verbal violence or passive aggression, into our lives. I'm not saying it's not Ok to be angry. That can be an honest emotion. It's how we express ourselves that will turn that anger or disappointment into the light or allow it to stay in the dark. We don't have to become dispassionate beings, but what this will lead us to is channeling our passions into our creativity and even greater cohesion of community and relationships. After all, aren't those the things to truly be passionate about, instead of our anger?
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